Writing is Tough!!!

I seem to have a passion for writing - like myriad other things such as shopping, sleeping, eating etc etc. ...the list is long. I particularly like to write romantic love stories – you know the likes that you see in most Hindi films or the ones you have read in Mills and Boons or Barbara Cartland – while in teens. The girl is poor but possesses exquisite beauty – the kind that you normally do not see in settings such as hers (unless some king/indrustialist is living in the slums with his queen/ex filmactress wife in disguise). And the hero – a successful self made man, a TDH( for those who have not read Mills and Boons or have forgotten these “youthful” terms – TDH stands for Tall Dark and Handsome). He is very strong, arrogant and egoistic on the outside a hard nut (to crack) – but has a soft pulpy core that is dying for true love(to be cracked)!! ButI did not want to write about the usual “girl-meets-boy-and-falls-in-love” He meets the girl in an unfavorable setting – in an antagonistic environment – and the relationship starts off with a fight. My story is about the “girl-meets-boy-hates-him-and-then-falls-in-love” They hate each other at first but are attracted helplessly towards each other none the less, like the 2 poles of a strong magnet…..and at the end – “You-know-what”…

A similar plot was cooking in my head for quite some time and I wanted to pen it down, lest I lose it like I had several others before. But I am a Mom with two kids – and a working one too – hence my hours for writing are quite limited. Plus I have zillion divursions in life...But this time I was determined, so I decided to take a day off and “focus” on the story.

I called in sick next morning and after sending my kids to school (hoping to get some quiet momemts) and at about 9.00 o ‘clock in the morning - I bolted my door. As I settled down with my laptop, a bird decided to sit on my window pane and announce the “spring” with its chirps. I looked out- the hills were beautiful lush green. The fields were green too but had liberal sprinkles of violets and yellows. The sky was blue and bright with the beaming sun - happy after being released from long days of captivity under the cloud’s clout. So many colorful birds chirped happily flickering their wings. The entire nature seemed to be in celebration - enjoying while they can - before the fearful sun scorches them with its summer heat. I stared mesmerized, immersed in the beauty until I was awaken by a soft knock. “Oh you are home?” – It was my husband who usually works from home. Yes,,I said, I called in sick today. He looked at me sitting with my laptop and gave me a quizzical look and closed the door behind him.

I looked at the clock – it was 11.30. Oh my God!! I stared at the blank WordPad document in front of me – I haven’t typed a SINGLE word! I hurriedly started on the story – with the description of the beauty of the ”lead” lady. The bird and the nature inspired me today. Her hair was a bounty of winter clouds (It rains in winter in California) , her lips were like the petals of a fresh red rose that blooms in early spring. When she walked, even the most gracious deer fell down in shame. And her eyes…..here I fell into a dilemma. I always thought green eyes carry much depth in the character (No, not associated to green-ocean-depth thingy) but looking at the bright blue sky outside, I thought blue eyes is not a bad idea after all when…


“Knock-Knock’!!
“Yes” I said.
My husband peeked in..”what’s for lunch? Since you are home today, I thought of asking”.
“There’s plenty of food in the refrigerator – go eat anything and everything that you want and ‘pretend’ I am not at home today”
Did you think I said that aloud? Off course not! – I am a dutiful wife you see! So I got down, warmed up his lunch, served him on a plate and came back up to ‘focus’ on my story.

About half an hour later while I was still debating whether to pick her eyes from the depths of ocean or to get it from the blues of sky, comes the knock again..
“What now”?
“Are you not going to have your lunch?” He actually “NOTICED” that I hadn’t eaten…

“No I am not quite hungry yet” (I will eat whenever I feel like and STOP disturbing me!!)

“Ok” – was his response..
The watch said 1:30 in the afternoon..

Reading the few lines that I had typed, I felt writing too much about the beauty of the “heroine” seemed to take the focus away from the actual theme.. so I concentrated on the story itself. I was weaving my thoughts around a highly dramatic moment of their first meet when “BANG” – the door opened!
My eight year “energy ball” stormed in. MOMMY you are home???” He comes back from school at 3.00 P.M
“Yes honey – Mommy was not feeling well today”. At first I did not want to admit that I wanted to write – wanted to surprise them all by my creation.
“How come you are not lying down on bed then?”
“I am not actually sick but wanted to write something..” Could not argue against the “strong” logic.
“Do you have an exam?”
“No – I just wanted to write a err…story”
“You mean – like in Books”?
“Yeah – kind of..”
“Then you can print a book?”
“Well…..if I write enough stories and nice ones that people like ..then yes”
“What if they are not nice?”
“Then they won’t get printed” Can you sense my dejection at the rejection - even before the expectation began?
“Oh whatever!!’ He bolted out…
After a few mins came another BANG and this time “I need a snack”.

I couldn’t ask him to go to daddy since he was working and I – sitting idle at home. So, away I went – further from my story. As I gave him a cup of Yogurt and some strawberries, I sensed the need of food for myself. I grabbed a sandwich and sat down with my son talking – mostly he filling me in with his daily “happenings”. After snacks, I asked him to focus on his homework while I focus on my story. Obediently he went, only to come back a few mins later – he needed help with his homework and wanted to do it BY Mommy!! So, I put aside my laptop and focused on his homework instead. By the time we were done, walked in my little princess!! Daddy brought her from school at 5.30 P.M. And this time “SHE” needed attention.

I shut down my computer – not caring to save whatever I had put down the “whole day”. Writing is not at all easy, it’ s very tough – especially for a wife and a Mom like me – so I gave up!!

As I went on with the chores of the day, I felt a tinge of sadness for the lovely girl not being able to fall in love with her prince charming …….and the world missing out on a classic “love-story” lol